Returning Home After 20 Years: My Story and How I Overcame the Challenges

23 September 2024

Returning Home After 20 Years: My Story and How I Overcame the Challenges

After 20 years spent abroad, I made the decision to return home, to Romania. The return wasn’t an easy choice, but it was a necessary one, for myself and the journey I’ve been on. I left with big dreams, gained invaluable experiences, but after two decades, I felt it was time to come back. However, coming back brought its own set of challenges – some expected, others more surprising.

Feeling Like a Stranger in My Own Country

One of the first things I encountered was the feeling that, although I was returning “home,” this “home” was no longer how I remembered it. The streets, the places, even the people – everything seemed different. Friends from the past had their own lives, sometimes so changed that it felt like we had lost touch. In the first months, I lived with a strong sense of being uprooted. I expected to feel at home from the very first moment, but I realized that this home was no longer exactly as I had left it.

What helped me overcome this feeling was allowing myself to feel without judgment. I understood that it’s normal to go through a period of adjustment, and that it wasn’t a simple return but a reinvention. I made space for the sadness of letting go of old memories, while also embracing the excitement of new discoveries.

Reverse Culture Shock

After so many years living in a different culture, I had become accustomed to another lifestyle, another mentality. Returning to Romania brought with it a form of reverse culture shock. Some things that once seemed normal here now felt foreign. The ways people interacted, certain societal aspects, certain values – all made me feel like, in a way, I no longer belonged.

I chose to approach this challenge with curiosity. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by these differences, I tried to explore and accept them as part of my new “home.” I learned not to constantly compare the two cultures but to embrace the positive aspects of both worlds.

Relationships with Loved Ones

Another delicate aspect was reconnecting with family and friends. In 20 years, our lives had taken different paths. Relationships weren’t the same as I had left them, and sometimes I felt an emotional distance that hadn’t been there before. I had to rebuild many connections from scratch.

I learned that to rebuild these relationships, honesty and patience were key. I spoke openly with those close to me about the changes I had gone through, and I listened with empathy to their stories. In doing so, we created a new space where we could rediscover each other. At the same time, I accepted that some friendships would remain in the past, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t form new connections that reflect who I am now.

Professional Integration

From a professional perspective, returning was a leap. After years spent in a different work environment, I faced a job market that was different, with new challenges and a different approach to things. Even though I came with vast international experience, I had to adapt to new realities and learn how to navigate a dynamic work landscape.

I focused on bringing everything I had learned abroad into my new professional life here. Flexibility and openness to new opportunities were essential. Now that I am practicing in Bucharest, in a space dedicated to coaching, I feel connected again with what I do, in a context that represents me and where I can fully use my accumulated experience.

How I Overcame These Challenges

One essential thing that helped me through these challenges was **self-compassion**. I allowed myself to be kind to myself and understand that any major change comes with moments of uncertainty. I accepted that it’s okay to have difficult days, but that they are part of my adaptation process.

The support of those around me, as well as participating in coaching sessions, helped me clarify and manage my emotions. Talking to someone who understands the transition process was extremely beneficial. At the same time, I focused on creating **new routines**. I explored the city, reconnected with the community, and discovered places and activities that made me feel anchored in the present again.

It wasn’t an easy journey, but what I learned from this experience is that returning home isn’t about going back to who you were but about building a new version of yourself, one that combines all the lessons and experiences lived in these 20 years. Change always brings opportunities, and once I embraced this idea, I managed to turn my return to Romania into a profound and meaningful experience.

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In her very calm and professional way, Ioana has helped me walk through specific thought processes and emotional states whilst identifying best practices in dealing with challenging situations. She continuously listens to one's questions and needs and adapts her academic insights, practices and experience accordingly.

Christine

Belgium

Ioana just oozes positive energy: she is empathetic without being overbearing, she asks the right questions without being intrusive, and she really knows how to take life with a grain of salt without ever questioning the legitimacy of your thoughts. Even during the most challenging of times, I always left our sessions with a sense of affirmation and accomplishment. Ioana made me laugh out loud, and helped me identify some practical 'tools' in order to bounce back from life's setbacks.

Laura

Brussels

Avant de commencer j'étais un peu sceptique. Ma première expérience ailleurs avait été complètement décevante. J'avais eu l'impression de parler à un mur.
Avec Ioana c'était complètement différent. Elle m'a poussé à agir depuis le début, m'a donné plein de conseils utiles et surtout m'a aidé à réaliser que c'est moi qui ai le pouvoir de décider mon avenir professionnel. Maintenant je ne subis plus et j'ai les bases pour prendre ma carrière en main.

Maria Dolores

Espagne

Ioana a un grand sens de l'écoute et de l'analyse des situations qui lui sont exposées, et ne pratique pas la langue de bois. De ce fait, elle "secoue" et c'est exactement ce qu'il faut parfois pour rebondir. Merci Ioana pour ton travail qui m'a fait avancer dans mes réflexions professionnelles.

Marie-Lou

Bruxelles

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Sandra

Bruxelles

Je suis allée voir Ioana à un moment de ma vie ou je me posais beaucoup de questions. Ma vie sentimentale était au plus bas après une rupture importante et ma vie professionnelle stagnait. Ioana a su m’aider à transformer mes peurs en énergie positive en prenant confiance en moi. Aujourd’hui, je me sens mieux et j’ai réussi à atteindre des objectifs que je m’étais fixée. Merci Ioana encore pour ton aide.

Marie

France

Il y a un peu plus d’un an je suis venue vers Ioana, car il était de plus en plus difficile pour moi d’aller travailler. Mon ex-patronne était une manipulatrice et elle me voyait en tant que rivale. Grâce à Ioana j’ai retrouvé ma confiance et j’ai pu me sentir bien avec la décision que j’ai prise. Aujourd’hui je me sens beaucoup mieux, plus d’insomnie, plus d’angoisse et une patronne avec qui la collaboration fonctionne à merveille. Encore merci pour cette baguette magique!

Wendy

Belgique

When I first contacted Ioana, I was feeling sad, confused, without knowing what path to take in life. After a few sessions, she helped me figuring out what I needed to do to live a meaningful life. Ioana has a compassionate and empathic attitude, asks pertinent questions and helped me putting the pieces of the puzzle together.